Satan is real.

     Growing up in a Christian family I was told a lot about God and how important a relationship with Him was.  When I went to church, a lot of the lessons were about God and his miraculous works He did on healing and teaching people. I was kind of in my own little world that nothing bad would ever happen to me because God could do anything.  It wasn’t until recently I learned the effects Satan can have on people and their lives. I always have known and believed that Satan was real, but I never thought he would ever attack me with anything. I can now look back over the past couple of years and the way I viewed myself and my actions did not add up to what God’s truth says about me. Since I was a little girl I had always been confident but in a healthy way. I was a very happy person growing up.  My parents said I was quite the little spark plug.  I saw a change in my attitude as well as other things when I started my 10^th grade year. I started hearing all these lies about myself and believed them. This is when my whole mind-set on life changed.

      I wasn’t a happy person on the inside anymore. I started to fall into a depression that led to trying to find my happiness in other people. That didn’t turn out good at all.  But what does when you’re seeking anything before God?  I was so angry at the world that I didn’t care what my attitude was like or what I did. I remember sometimes thinking, “This is not me!! Where is this coming from?” I felt like I was going crazy. I have struggled with self-confidence, anger, bitterness, and forgiveness for a long time. I would pray for God just to take these burdens and hurts from me, but I still felt the same.

     Being here in India has opened my eyes to things I have never thought about. Satan is real and he had ahold on my life for a while. I remember hearing these lies that started with “you” and not “I”, but the more I believed them the more it turned into “I”. I believed everything he said about me. Satan had me to the point of feeling hopeless, weak, and trapped. I didn’t think I would ever get over this pain in my heart. I would always talk about doing better and wanting to change, but it would always lead to getting deeper into the hole I was already in.  I needed to take action!

     It wasn’t until I started reading a book, “Victory Over the Darkness”, which changed my viewpoint. It revealed to me how God views me and about his truths and promises. I was in awe that God felt this way about me. He didn’t want me to feel trapped, left without confidence, or feeling hopeless. God hurts when I hurt. I started looking up scripture and my heart felt relieved that I don’t have to listen to these lies anymore.  There is truly freedom in Christ! I recently made the decision through prayer to let go completely of the things that have caused me hurt, anger, and unhappiness. I made the decision to lay it all down at my Heavenly Father’s feet and trust Him.  I never have given something to God trusting He would provide me with more than I could ever dream of. I’m not going to lie; I’m a little scared. These are things I have been clinging to for years but I have a sense of peace knowing I have given them up. Finally!!!

     God loves me more than I will ever know and He longs for that intimate relationship with me. In saying all of this I want you to know that being a Christian doesn’t mean the evil one won’t attack you. If anything, we are the ones he messes with the most. Satan is real and will hit you at any point in your life. I know now that when these moments arise with lies and my past, I can put on the full armor of God and be ready! Thank you Jesus for your faithfulness; thank you for loving me when I was so quick to turn my head from you. I love you.

Ephesian 6:13-17 “ Therefore, put on every piece of God’s armor so you will be able to resist the enemy in the time of evil. Then after the battle you will still be standing firm. Stand your ground, putting on the belt of truth and the body armor of God’ s righteousness. For shoes, put on the peace that comes from the Good News so that you will be fully prepared. In addition to all of these, hold up the shield of faith to stop the fiery arrows of the devil. Put on salvation as your helmet, and take the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God.”